‘Dumbo’ Review: A Dumb Burton Disney Film
“Dumbo” is the latest big, dumb, soulless Disney remake, only this time it is directed by somebody who used to have a bit of panache back in his day: Tim Burton. That panache is nowhere to be found in this bloated, mesmerizingly stupid affair that really makes you wonder: how long can Disney keep up this remake train?
There seems to be no purpose behind this movie (of course, besides a cash grab), as the messages it imparts on its youthful audience are as bland as the child actors’ line delivery. The messages, in no particular order: believe in yourself, appearance doesn’t matter, and animal cruelty sucks. A toddler could have told me that.
The wooden child actors are Nico Parker and Finley Hobbins, and they play the children of Colin Farrell’s Holt, who used to be a circus attraction but returns from World War I with only one arm. This family is part of the Medici Bros. Circus, headed by Max Medici (Danny Devito). The circus has fallen on hard times until a baby elephant with giant ears is born into the care of the assorted circus freaks (the least sympathetic freaks Burton’s ever directed).
You probably now the story from here. The baby pachyderm is Dumbo, and everyone ridicules his ears until he shows off his flight skills. This is the first of many contrivances, as only a truly evil person could not love Dumbo’s adorably oversized ears.
The movie has a lot of problems with audiences, namely, showing their reactions to certain things. It is a wondrous sight when an elephant flies, but it is made less so when we only see people we don’t care about staring, mouths agape, at the occurrence. Maybe Disney should try to show us just the magic happening, and see if we still believe.
Structurally, “Dumbo”, like most blockbusters these days, is plagued by the problem of too-fast pacing. Every single bad thing that can possibly happen in each scene of the movie happens. Ostensibly magical moments escalate into chaos at the snap of a gauntlet. Why does a movie about a flying elephant have to also be an action movie? Don’t we have enough of those already?
The only good thing I can say about this movie is the acting (not the children). Danny Devito plays the best (and really, only) character, and he plays him with exuberant glee. My eyes were glued whenever he was on screen. Joining him for the lollygags are Michael Keaton as a Disneyfied version of Bob Iger, and Alan Arkin in a bit part. Those three are quite good, doing their usual schtick. They are possibly the only reason to watch “Dumbo”.
A dulled down, dumbed up drab affair, “Dumbo” will at best please noone, and, at worst, enrage real-life animal activists.
{★☆☆☆}